Stress

Stress: 

A common issue in today's society is show much stress we put on ourselves and how stressed our lives are. 

 I, for one am completely guilty of spending too much time on work and just not enough me time, and I never realised the toll, this actually took on me and the others around me. I will tell you I'm always that person to think I haven't studied enough, therefore I will end up studying almost 7 hours. Only to realise in a state of panic that it's 1:00 am and tomorrow (today) I am going to be extremely tired. It also took a toll on how I saw life, I wasn't my usually bubbly happy self but rather my extremely, tired, grumpy and stressed self. Because stress was directly linked to my lack of sleep, I didn't actually have clear vision or perception of the world around me. I constantly believed my friends didn't like me and that I was hated by everybody, which I clearly wasn't but because of my high stress I began to believe these things. This all took a snowball effect on my happiness. Because of the such busy and go-go lifestyles we have we begin to forget, that small things such as happiness. I began to forget what it mean to smile and laugh and just enjoy the simple things without worrying about the future, or what university I might attend, or the next exam or SAC I am going to sit, I completely forgot how to live in the moment, and just be present! 

Today a friend told me, what really in a sense was a wake up call and she literally begged me to just relax and stop. Just that single care from someone changed my day. I realised I do not need to spend hours and hours each day studying which is important on some days, but is completely unnecessary for each day of the week. She told me to just do something I enjoyed for once, something that relaxed me and caused me to have no stress and be the me that I once was. She's a gem and called me tonight just to check and see what I was doing and making sure I wasn't doing homework! So the rest of this post will be a bunch of tips to help take the stress or relieve the stress out of your life. 

Friends

Surrounding yourself with good friends, or even just forming meaningful relationships with others can dramatically relieve the stress you are feeling. Think about it, let's say you had a friend that was drug dependent, you would constantly be worrying about them for days on end. Compared to a friend that made you laugh, that you could call when anything goes wrong or just even, someone to give you a hug. This can help in so many ways. So instead of focusing on the quantity of friends you have focus on the quality. 

Meditation: 

This may sound a little weird to some people, but this can really help get your mind in order. In fact there is an app that you can download from the App store called Smiling mind, it is completely free and takes you through the steps and importance of meditation. I do mine 5 mins before i go to bed and I find this makes a massive difference. 

Taking me time: 

Taking time out of your day, whether it be 5 minutes all to yourself to just breathe and be alone with your thoughts, can be really beneficial or it can be something more, exciting or big such as a spa say or even some time at the hairdresser. The important thing is to do something that you love and just be present in the moment. 

5 grateful things:

I advise every body to do this , every night before you go to bed get a diary and write 5 things you are grateful for, it can be as simple as having some food on the table. This will really help in making you go to sleep in a good mood, therefore you are more likely to wake up in a better mood, causing less stress in your life. 

I also advise you all to read this book that has really helped me in finding my quest for happiness and a stress free lifestyle and that is 'The Happiness Project' RRP $24.99 AUD 

Below you guys can all share what you all do to relieve stress and let's help each other. 

Carly xx 

Being Quiet

Not going to lie my whole life I have been the quiet girl at the back of the classroom, or even just at the back of the party, with a desperate longing to be one of the confident girls. I had always wondered why I felt so discontent with myself, being this way. Then it had all occurred to me that society looked down upon the introverted, souls in the world, and maybe even sometimes without realizing it. We have all heard the term 'come out of your shell,' and as a quiet soul like myself in my opinion there isn't something more offensive someone could say. It is almost like 'saying forget who you are, and just pretend to be someone else.' A little contradictory to a society that emphasizes to "always be yourself". Because of this frowned upon personality trait, i had grown to actually hate myself, and at every party or social event, I tried my hardest to just be confident, outgoing and talk to every person at that party, but someone the title of being the quiet girl never seemed to leave me. And at the end of the night or day I was still left, with my empty, insecure, quiet self, that couldn't seem to break free.

I literally read everything on the internet, that might help me become more outgoing, and throughout all of these websites and books there was one common theme ' Don't care about anyone's opinion.' I don't know about you, but I am someone who holds high regards of others' opinion about myself; and find it almost impossible to not care about someone else's opinion of me. Since we are human to some extent we all want to be included and be a part of something. So to some extent we all care about others opinions of us, I feel as if those people, that say don't worry about what others say, have a.) never been in a situation where others have criticized them, or  b.) generally do care about what others think, they just try to convince themselves they don't. I once had a friend that told me not to worry about what others thought, to which I asked her, don't you care about what others think? To which she responded with a stern 'no', I then though to myself has she ever really been in a situation where others, have ever not liked her, or not befriended her because of a simple so-called personality "flaw". I mean she is the girl everybody wants to be friends with, so in a way I almost feel like it's easier for her to say! I've gone through my whole life with people telling me,

'I love you but, you're so quiet'
"You're quiet so we can't talk to you"
"You're not very loud, so you don't belong here"

These words are like pouring salt on my cuts, cutting open wounds that never healed. But what I don't understand from people is why they feel the need to say something like that, or that everybody has to be loud in the world, and if you're not, then your some kind of human with a defect. What is so remarkable about this, is that people assume that because you are quiet you are boring, or don't know how to let loose. The last time I checked the definition of quiet, never equated to the same one as boring.

 I am here to tell you guys, that sometimes that girl or boy at the back of the classroom, just wants or longs for someone to talk to them or even say hi, let them know you know they exist. Because quiet people are also very observant people, we know when someone body language says they hate us, we know when someone is sad and quite frankly the world needs some introverted people like us.

So if you're quiet I say to you, YOU ARE AWESOME. YOU ARE ONE OF A KIND AND IRREPLACEABLE. Don't let anyone tell you, you are different and trust me you are not alone, in how you are feeling.

Carly xx